May I Have This Dance

There are times in life where you go through something that requires a period of reflection. Time to truly appreciate what happened, good or bad, and be able to see God's hand through the whole thing. Sometimes  you don't always get to see what you were looking for. Some things take longer then others, and some turn out far better then you could ever imagine.

I have been going through this period of reflection for the time I spent in Colorado this past summer. It was a summer where I truly felt like myself. I was finally able to dance. I was never very good at dancing, I would need a strong leader to take charge and guide me, which I have had before, but this summer I discovered a whole new way of dancing for me. I took the lead and danced on my own, with people around, or when I was alone, I danced and I didn't care who was watching. I simply took charge and let life unfold before me. Through this summer, my eyes were opened to 3 very important concepts. Prayer, time, and freedom. In these I have found a deeper meaning to life and and a stronger relationship with the trinity. In this time of reflection I was able to realize that while I was getting to better understand myself I also grew closer to the Holy Spirit, the Father, and the Son.

I  originally wanted my summer dedicated to prayer. As I began to pray more and more I began to question the whole point of prayer. So I went to scripture. Here I found stories of normal people, such as Elijah, who was sinner just like me who found great power through prayer. The 5th chapter of James taught me to pray with faith and not to put God in a box or limit him in anyway. It opened my imagination about the God that I serve. Through this I had two very close friends begin to fall madly in love with Jesus. It brought me joy and it brought me on my knees before God in worship and celebration. In prayer I discovered the Holy Spirit, the counselor sent by Jesus when he left the earth to return to heaven. As I began to pray the Holy Spirit's presence in my life could not be ignored and I found peace.

I have always been pretty selfish with my time. I would always be busy but it would be all for me. What I wanted and when I wanted it to happen. Time was for me all the way and something I could easily be in control of. This summer I began to see time differently. To me it is amazing that God is not concerned with time. He has it all planned perfectly, time is not a limit for him. So the fact that I want to do so many things and go so many places is no longer burdensome because it will happen in God's timing. Life is a process, and I am slowly growing, growing closer to God and closer to who he wants me to be and has planned for my life. I let go of my control of time and handed it over to him, everything is better in his hands. It is also great to think that there will be no time in eternity, so I am now trying not to panic about time here and now. in my new discovery of limitless, perfect, time I know that if I am living for my King then all is well. There is no need to rush anything or try and check everything off my list just yet, he has it planned out and I know that it will be grand.

Through both my learning of prayer and time I found freedom. A freedom that is only brought on by grace from the death on the cross by Jesus Christ as a sacrifice for our sins. Freedom that allows me to now live unashamedly as myself, a daughter of the King. I have nothing to hide and nothing to fear because my Jesus is victorious. And because of this I will worship through prayer and through my life. I will no longer limit my God and I will have faith in Him and the things he can accomplish and the power he holds. I will know that time is no battle for my Lord and that with Him I will have a life that is worth living in celebration. Because of this freedom: I will dance.